Achoooooooo

I keep fighting by writing, but ultimately sealing my indictment, that i'm a negative person, making everyone else miserable cuz i'm hurting, I keep begging for help, im tired of having to take care of myself, no matter what I do I can't accrue any wealth, boredom and loneliness are effecting my health, perhaps it's time to shelf my dream, it's just way too improbable it seems, I don't have the energy nor the heart, to courageously brave another restart, it's much too hard, after being feathered and tarred, humiliation can leave a scar, changing ur superficial appearance shldnt affect who u truly are, i'm sick of people playing pretend and dress up, don't I deserve to get sex and love, what the hell is so wrong with me, i'm easy to please and have essential needs, it's one thing to not say bless u when I sneeze, but i refuse to beg and plead on my knees, i already got down and dirty after rolling up my sleeves, I wave my white flag in defeat, u finally win by default, i feel as tho my souls been mauled, I don't believe or have faith anymore, lately i wonder what i'm even here for, the only point to life, is dealing with more pain plight and strife, i can't bare one more minute, of being diminished to insignificant, despite knowing my value and worth, under appreciation lingers and lurks, hard work used to at least always pay, but now i'm afraid my blue skies have turned gray and they're here to stay!,

Peace and 1,
JC
9/8/15