Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Give Myself Permission

I know what I want until someone starts asking me, I'm afraid to share cuz when I do ya'll call me crazy harassingly, my dreams seem impossible to achieve, why won't u just have faith and believe, do u think I don't know how hard it is, I'm sorry if ur unfulfilled and unhappy with ur personal affairs and business, but I am not ur failed plans, guess I gotta pull up my boot straps and be a man, quit bitching and complaining, about how my life is so awful soulsucking and draining, think maybe tho when u stop crying and whining, it's because over half ur heart's been slowly eroding and dying, every time I don't get picked, it get's harder and harder to find the will to live, what's the point to life, if it's only to work pay bills and somehow manage to survive all the strife, then there's the atrocity that lingers and bothers me, it's just not the right time for me obviously, but my patience has run thin, when will I learn to let go so the real healing can begin, gotta give myself more credit and permission, it's overwhelmingly stressful and depressing secretly hoping and wishing, nice guys don't have to automatically fall prey or victim, staying single isn't a sin!

Peace and 1,
JC
11/30/15

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