I wanna pretend u don't exist, maybe then I can start to live, u break my heart everytime u won't pick me, it's an illusion we're free, u can't help who u love, tho I want another hug, letting u go again is too hard, I need to run away far, cuz i don't know how to fake happy without u, haven't graduated relationship school, falling for an unavailable guy, my smile is a lie, at night I cry, try to close my eyes and die, like my heart does a lil each day, my soul has lost hope and faith, patience can't wait it's just too late, I've thrown in the towel and given up, no more gullible shmuch, fuck happily ever after and fairy tales, superstardom and financial success pales, in comparison to the thought of forever being alone, stuck sleeping at my folks Cranston RI home, I'm scared no one really cares, and I'm simply not strong enough to conquer my fears, the thought of u not here, makes me sit numb dumb founded in shock as I stare, wish my feelings could've been spared, sometimes I think I'm mentally/sexually impaired, I knew this is what ud do and it's not cool, u never follow thru, and proved I'm just ur tool, such a sorry excuse and an over trusting fool!
Peace and 1,
JC
1/9/16
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