I keep misdirecting anger, I've become but a stranger, looking in the mirror, wish I could see the future clearer, but it's all hopes wishes and dreams, nothing ever is as it seems, it's just illusions, so melodramatic thinking I'm destroyed and ruined, cuz things didn't go exactly as planned, sometimes we don't see the purpose or understand, why we go thru what we do, everything up until this point has made u, the person u are right now, I often can't contemplate how, did I even make it this far, and my heart didn't grow cold and hard, my soul is still intact, the truth is impossible to find in a world filled with alternative facts, am I the only one who thinks shit's gone crazy, the next generation is spoiled coddled and lazy, especially when it comes to work ethic, what's ur motto/method, to get thru life, with all the pain and strife, obstacles and hurdles, when things go south get rotten coagulated and curdled, which makes existence seem disgustingly gross and messy, miss the good old days taking high rides with the besty, now failed expectations define friendships, not to mention all the fun activities are expensive, especially food beaches sports games parking concerts or going to the movies, course u could sell sex if u got a big dick or boobies, be a pimp or a drug dealer, ain't nobody in hip hop more conscious or realer, fuck humble modesty, I'll give pure unadulterated uncensored honesty, try to be super genuine, a gay white rapper who's not stereotypically over-sexualized or feminine, just ur average Joe, fame and fortune isn't what matters tho, I wanna leave a lasting positive mark, open people's minds and touch their heart, make the hairs stand up straight, not because they're afraid, but they get the chills, from connecting relating and appreciating my actual talent and skills, I may sarcastically jest, I know I'm not the best, I strive to learn and be better, let's existentially elevate and rise high together, unite to fight, for truth justice equality love and light, we should all strive to do what's right, our voices have might, just like peaceful protest, pillaging looting and unnecessary violence is stupid and grotesque, treat others the way u want to be treated, if u said Trump would be President 5 years ago I wouldn't have believed it, I mean a reality tv star, what's worse is this is now standard/par, maybe Oprah will be next, I often wonder if humans are inherently cursed or hexed, I've heard of original sin, not everyone is destined to have kin, but we deserve the chance, to lend a helping hand, provide stability and a family to underprivileged abandoned unwanted youth, u can't make or teach someone to be homosexual so that point is moot, I'm sick and tired of illogical screwed up excuses, when we lack compassion empathy or sympathy our collective soul loses, whether u say salute peace or blessed be, please like Mike sang "make it a better place for u and for me"!
Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
10/5/17
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