Ur silence worries me more than anything u could say, u can't change things the harder u pray, it takes action, not verbal lashings, candid criticism, when neither of us is listening, we're both a mess, jynxed
and hexed, in pain and stressed, wondering what happens next, guess I'm single and ready to mingle, they're chocolate jimmies or rainbow sprinkles, there are Granny Smith and other apples, failed relationships are hard to grapple, hope my heart heals, while my soul still is brave enough to deeply trust and feel, I don't want to be jaded by lost love, we just had to give up, focus on our individual selves, keeping busy helps, a healthy way to deal, I need an empathy shield, so I don't lose and confuse what's urs and what's mine, I'm questioning if it pays to be kind, evil seems to be prosperously winning, morality and common sense are thinning, it's like a free fall for all, u ever get so angry only thing u can do is ball, plus I say stuff I don't mean, if only my insults could make u bleed, sorry not sorry I wanna hurt u as bad as u did me, I don't wanna be free, what happened to "I'm Yours", don't make me get down on all fours, but while I'm there, we never really celebrated 1 year, like it didn't even matter, I noticed I was getting lazier and fatter, way too comfortable, was waiting for him to be less insufferable, I always saw the best version of him, would suck it up often and let him win, usually he was wrong, he's a music career expert from djing and creating one song, laugh out loud, I've got 22 boo and I'm super proud, all I ever wanted was a compliment tho, and wanted ur approval u know, urs was the opinion that I cherished most, wish I didn't always have to drive pay and host, wasn't much of a partnership, how does one go about getting a grant donation or sponsorship, I could use some financial assistance, I heard dreams come true with passion talent drive and persistence, so I keep on working and growing, want my name to blow up like a volcanic explosion, so I can live my truth, otherwise the point to life seems aloof, I refuse to be put on hold or mute, got a great smile and adorably cute, but give me the mic and one of my beats, and I become drop dead sexy, exuding raw divinity, jaw dropping awe and amazement quieting everyone in the surrounding vicinity, the "attention grabber", "a faggot cracker rapper", who breaks barriers limitations expectations and walls, is anyone else having good hip hop withdrawals, cuz I am, not looking for "Stan" fans, just trying to relate and connect, I am not God and far from the best, but I certainly try, wanna leave a lasting legacy that can survive long after I die, epic and legendary, I truly do believe in faith and my destiny!
Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
5/15/18
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