I officially suck at life, the decisions I make just ain't right, everything's a fight, but I still maintain love and light, but I'm also a Gemini, with extreme lows and highs, not just monotone, I despise the misspelling of homophones, get smart, use heart, instead of ur guts or brain, people don't change but nothing stays the same, it's not that I don't need help, I just know and take care of myself, I took the time, to explore travel and find, thru trial and error, gotta not be ruled by fear and terror, be brave, don't always behave, trouble is my middle name, relationships are such a game, never 50/50, why y'all gotta be so shady and shifty, I put my worst foot forward, try to make the best of what the universe offered, which isn't easy, seems it pays to be sleazy, these billionaires are so greedy, I judge a person by the way they treat me, don't believe in gossip and rumor, I have a very dry sarcastic sense of humor, not a fan of slapstick comedy, sorry not sorry but I love sodomy, but then again I'm gay, fuck no I don't pray, or practice structured religion, I truly believe that Earth is either hell or a prison, trapped and unhappy, if ur curious just come and ask me, I'm an open book, I gave way more than I ever took, I admit my faults and flaws, take responsibility for mistakes too of course, how else do u learn and grow, I'm stubborn and rarely do what I'm told, a revolutionary/rebel, quite the lil devil, with a mischievous smirk, my ex was a selfish asshole/jerk, nothing but a user, a lazy ungrateful moocher, good riddens to bad rubbish, getting back on the dating horse I've been super slow and sluggish, too much excess baggage and luggage, it takes courage, I don't wanna risk another chance, was duped by lust at first glance, he wasn't capable of love, cuz he didn't know how to trust, a recovering junky, but in my eyes he was very sexy and hunky, but it was all a lie, like Ariana "ain't got no tears left to cry", I didn't mean it when I said I wanted him to die, after all I hated being ghosted, he never ever hosted, he couldn't drive and was unemployed, he disliked my pre-used toys, expected me to accept his past, but the double standard hypocrisy reared it's ugly head fast, he was abusive and controlling, not supportive or consoling, but anyway enough about him, I'm ready to rebegin, start all over again, make my own family and new friends, cuz existence is fleeting, it's tough leaving, but I'm more scared of staying, I've become numb too comfortable and complacent, yet unfortunately there's not much choice, I'm' bored frustrated and annoyed, is this the best God has to offer, sick of everybody lining their coffers, while the majority of the population is broke, living paycheck to paycheck is no joke, money is man made, we're limited how much we can make, when the 1% hoards it all, our economy is about to collapse and fall, quite frankly it appears we're screwed, guess this is what happens when true good and the virtuous lose!
Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
9/20/18
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