Cursed On The Verge Of The First Purge

I still need help, finding strength and confidence within myself, my level of faith is incredible, my soul's stifled and it's in peril, I just wanna be free to be me, ya'll don't see me weep or my heart bleed, as it's being beaten and destroyed, I'm not some slutty slave-like boy toy, I'm a person, and ur kink shaming is hurting, what about different strokes for different folks, I hate discovering everything u said u experienced and knew was a hoax, I don't need to be persuaded or coaxed, I simply like blokes, in a pair of beaten up skate shoes or trainers, bondage play is a no brainer, sign me up, there's a fine line between sex and love, I want to be controlled not owned, consent is always condoned, and very necessary along with trust, a safe word is a must, never know what can happen, please don't be discourteous and be laughing, especially right to my face, I don't deserve to be ostracized or disgraced, I'm sick of insecure evil people, the amount of ignorance is unbelievable, like electing Trump unlocked and unleashed Pandora's Box, u shouldn't open the door when the devil knocks, look thru the peep hole, to avoid deep woe, what happened to common sense, does anyone even carry cents, I barely have dollars, u from the streets or hobnob with scholars, I prefer the poor, they give more, often at their own expense, fuck impeachment we'd be stuck with Pence, who's a religious extremist, I despise all these billionaire elitists, and what's with all this political correctness, this country's becoming anti immigrant gay black and feminist, talk about oppression, we're on the verge of world wide depression, the worst one yet, God blessed the dead, cuz the living are cursed, bringing to fruition the first purge, hope u know ur value and worth, please watch out and remember the power of words, I recently forgot and said some awful stuff, to my first true adult relationship/soulmate/love, and no amount of apologies will cut it, I regret a lot of dumb shit, I didn't mean any of what I said, I lost my cool and my head, I was so angry and upset, he never came correct, expected respect without leading by example, my desire to open up and date again has been trampled, I wanna be alone, make my own kinky home, a nice safe space, I'll do whatever it takes, I won't be stopped nor concerned by the tick tock, and damn sure won't let my life and timing be dictated by some man made concoction called a clock!

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
7/6/18