Been practicing acting that I'm a good loser, funny how cliche the abused becomes the abuser, enormously handling life poorly, feeding the feeling of poor me, wasting so much energy, fighting the frenemy envy/jealousy, it sucks and is fucked up, how most lgbtqa don't know real friendship community or love, my experience isn't the norm, always been an outsider trying to conform, out of sheer loneliness, wish I could cure fear and phoniness, I'm an old school genuine gentleman, humbly both sexy and intelligent, just not everybody's cup of tea, lost my self respect living to people please, forgetting I too am valuable and worthy, I'm terrified y'all want to hurt me, claiming I'm one of those white privileged gays, here to just steal and appropriate, like one race owns hip hop culture, I ain't a snake shark or vulture, but I do love Mariah Pac and Lauryn Hill, absolutely will stand on my talent passion and skill, I don't want to do anything else, music's therapeutic soothing and really helps, in fact it saves my life each and every day, go look up "Everything Is Everything" "Unconditional Love" and "There's Got To Be A Way"!
MCJC/The Poet
1/3/22
