Tuesday, September 25, 2018

Revolutionary Artist Or Econometrician Chartist

Karma means no good deed goes unpunished, my poetry blog will most likely remain professionally unpublished, fame is fun, but only money makes us feel like we've won, it's rather sad actually, my talent comes so naturally, yet the music biz, is aimed more for kids, so at 36 I'm too old, without music life seems so cold, like Mariah it's my saving grace, seems today only crime pays, just looking at the President, it's pretty clear cut and evident, evil has finally gained the reigns, and keeps fanning the flames, causing chaos and destruction, the middle class needs an eruption, perhaps another revolution, it's either destitution or evolution, or are we too smart for our own good, pretending to play God like we ever could, we're only human, but wtf are we doing, we're like cancer, ignoring the root cause of problems so there's no chance at an answer, looking like duped fools, laws are moot rules, that should adapt to the times, sometimes with writer's block I have a lapse in rhymes, but I believe it's ok not to be ok, we all have both good and bad days, that's the roller coaster ride of existence, it takes passion and persistence, to become successful, creating art shouldn't be stressful, for me it's a coping mechanism, I am not a fan of protectionism, especially as a foreign policy, wish people would exude more honesty empathy and modesty, capitalism breeds competition, so sick of tired of being taken advantage of and propositioned, I'm not ur resource, when wronged I have no recourse, like in this case I'm the exception, not to be confused with special or lucky, I swear the universe loves to sarcastically fuck me, like I'm the butt of their jokes, this is hell or one giant hoax, they're crying from laughing so hard, success is a la carte, cuz we can't have it all, gravity means that which rises will fall, have we already piqued, are u good at being criticized or critiqued, cuz I'm not, I hate it a lot, especially by someone who is unqualified, why when we die are we buried in a coffin after being embalmed with formaldehyde, trying to slow down decomposition, the US needs a econometrician, yes that's a real word and they exist, if I were Obama I'd be pissed, Trump shat all over his legacy, green is the color of money envy and jealousy, except when it comes to energy it means clean, I want a hip hop song the teens fiend, is that really too much to ask, I feel this urge to take the whole globe to task, why can't we grow, stop selling our collective soul, let's adjust the way we operate, I won't remake Juicy Changes I Will Survive or Lady Marmalade, I'm an original artist, I would say that Bernie was a chartist, look it up if u don't know, what's the point of counting down if u won't go?!

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
9/25/18

Thursday, September 20, 2018

It Takes Courage To Depress The Sluggish Rubbish Of Excess Luggage

I officially suck at life, the decisions I make just ain't right, everything's a fight, but I still maintain love and light, but I'm also a Gemini, with extreme lows and highs, not just monotone, I despise the misspelling of homophones, get smart, use heart, instead of ur guts or brain, people don't change but nothing stays the same, it's not that I don't need help, I just know and take care of myself, I took the time, to explore travel and find, thru trial and error, gotta not be ruled by fear and terror, be brave, don't always behave, trouble is my middle name, relationships are such a game, never 50/50, why y'all gotta be so shady and shifty, I put my worst foot forward, try to make the best of what the universe offered, which isn't easy, seems it pays to be sleazy, these billionaires are so greedy, I judge a person by the way they treat me, don't believe in gossip and rumor, I have a very dry sarcastic sense of humor, not a fan of slapstick comedy, sorry not sorry but I love sodomy, but then again I'm gay, fuck no I don't pray, or practice structured religion, I truly believe that Earth is either hell or a prison, trapped and unhappy, if ur curious just come and ask me, I'm an open book, I gave way more than I ever took, I admit my faults and flaws, take responsibility for mistakes too of course, how else do u learn and grow, I'm stubborn and rarely do what I'm told, a revolutionary/rebel, quite the lil devil, with a mischievous smirk, my ex was a selfish asshole/jerk, nothing but a user, a lazy ungrateful moocher, good riddens to bad rubbish, getting back on the dating horse I've been super slow and sluggish, too much excess baggage and luggage, it takes courage, I don't wanna risk another chance, was duped by lust at first glance, he wasn't capable of love, cuz he didn't know how to trust, a recovering junky, but in my eyes he was very sexy and hunky, but it was all a lie,  like Ariana "ain't got no tears left to cry", I didn't mean it when I said I wanted him to die, after all I hated being ghosted, he never ever hosted, he couldn't drive and was unemployed, he disliked my pre-used toys, expected me to accept his past, but the double standard hypocrisy reared it's ugly head fast, he was abusive and controlling, not supportive or consoling, but anyway enough about him, I'm ready to rebegin, start all over again, make my own family and new friends, cuz existence is fleeting, it's tough leaving, but I'm more scared of staying, I've become numb too comfortable and complacent, yet unfortunately there's not much choice, I'm' bored frustrated and annoyed, is this the best God has to offer, sick of everybody lining their coffers, while the majority of the population is broke, living paycheck to paycheck is no joke, money is man made, we're limited how much we can make, when the 1% hoards it all, our economy is about to collapse and fall, quite frankly it appears we're screwed, guess this is what happens when true good and the virtuous lose!   

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
9/20/18

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

Nothing's Guaranteed It's What U Believe

After my last relationship ended I gave up on marriage, it's as outdated as coal cds and the horse and carriage, maybe I'm jaded being gay, I can't pray my kinks away, so I remain a freak, perhaps hell is life on repeat, nothing but pain and tragedy, wish success came naturally miraculously or magically, cuz no matter how hard I work, along comes another moocher/jerk, who takes and takes but never gives, I'm not the best at free-styling adlibs, I'm a writer, a lgbtq activist and social justice fighter, but I've lost the will to hope, my faith too is very low, seems evil has finally gained the upper hand, a lack of empathy and common sense is hard to understand, how have we gotten this far gone, where did it all go wrong, we were progressing, now we're second guessing, our morals and ethics thrown out the window, I feel like a widow, tho my love is alive, I can't help wonder if it was just a lie, I was simply used, now I'm left super bitter resentful and confused, he plays the victim of abuse, but it's a delusional pathological ruse, I wish him the best, but I want him hexed, even the good hearted can be consumed by revenge, 2 important words are intent and consent, they signify murder and rape, sometimes I think I wanna rap in a fidora with a cane and cape, like a hip hop superhero, on a scale of 1-10 he was a stupid 0, pretty much a waste of time, I wish I didn't have to fake smile and say I'm fine, when the truth is I'm destroyed, so sick of being temporarily employed, altho I like this new job, I was totally robbed, by my old boss's fraudulent claim, my future opportunity was maimed, yet I still have to pick up the pieces and be brave, can't give in or up nor cave, this is my chance to start over again, move somewhere else and make new friends, I'm so unhappy unfulfilled and bored here all I do is get bent, I swear my family is heaven sent, I'm very lucky, thanks for the compliment of wanting to fuck me, random hookups just aren't my style, I'm always willing to go that extra mile, but I'm tired of no reciprocity, it deeply effects and bothers me, a partnership is not a one way street, I find it nearly impossible to admit defeat, sensitivity doesn't make men weak, it's ok if ur a geek, u gotta own it, I will no longer loan shit, without it being in writing, our consciousness needs igniting, are u woke, do u vote, we all must do our part, to revitalize our legacy our soul and our heart, get back some of the integrity we lost, compromise is inevitable but at what cost, we have got to learn to work together, team work is the only way to make things better, since we are at such a pivotal point, now is not the time to ignore or drink away problems and smoke a joint, get off those unnecessary opioids, stop benching and ghosting to avoid, this is reality minus the virtual, the younger generations believe the perfect match is searchable, as if the internet is a modern day online catalog of available people, being behind a screen can give some the anonymous power of evil, creating fake profiles and trolling, statistics are as about an exact science as polling, nothing in existence is guaranteed, screw other people's judgmental opinions the most important thing is what u believe!

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
9/12/18

Wednesday, August 22, 2018

The Descension: In The Yin

My world changes from day to day, sometimes my anxiety makes me afraid, what if I'm not good enough, easily gullible attracted to lust, probably over trust, which is needed for love, u can't have one without the other, I treat everyone like fathers mothers sisters and brothers, in other words family, I hate greedy people who win underhandedly, the sinister are out in full force, I am not defined by my flaws mistakes or warts, I am all I've done, please don't ghost or shun, it's impolite, we forgot about the power of light, we're in the dark part of the yin, thing is neither side ever truly wins, it's what's more dominant, I hope to become one of music's prominent, wish ya'll would give me a chance, my songs are meant for dance, they're for chilling on high rides, I have trouble conquering my tides, finding equilibrium and balance, I feel at a disadvantage because of my respectfulness and valiance, am I the last of my kind, I'll be successful even if I die trying, it's what I'm here for, I won't be a part of their war, I fight for truth justice and consciousness, aren't ya'll sick of this obnoxiousness, whether economical or political, the struggle is real and literal, not just a figure of speech, since I can do I guess I can't teach, practice what u preach, don't be a mooch or a leech, it's annoying, thank God I'm elastic and buoyant, can rise again and bounce back, karma mounts fast, and u get what u give, so many are alive but don't live, all robotic slave-like and zombified, when we colonized we should've compromised, instead we quelled the indigenous, we've become numb self righteous hypocrites, spreading corruption disguised as democracy, this huge wealth distribution gap is destroying the economy demonstrably, it might be too late to fix, does fate exist, was this our destiny, how will history measure me, I care about my legacy, I wonder if most murder is caused by envy and jealousy, especially crimes of passion, will our government accept responsibility and take action, cuz Congress is useless, can only get by so much on ur cuteness, besides looks fade, we all age, those are the facts of life, could cut the tension with an ax or knife, so consumed by fear, entombed my tears, sensitivity is a sign of weakness, the next sequence is the descension of Jesus, our divine mythical lord and savior, except this time he won't sacrifice himself based on our bad behavior, we don't deserve redemption, save ur confession, some sins deserve suspension, I often wonder if existence is a curse or a blessing!

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
8/22/18 

Friday, August 10, 2018

Having Talent & Skills Doesn't Pay The Bills

Ya'll may scoff and laugh at this, but fuck hope it's way too passive, it gives permission to let someone else do all the work, and creates lazy victimized jerks, who never take action, do u really think another Holocaust can't happen, the divide is growing, evil's face is showing, at least we now know the truth, guess we inherently lean to certain groups, we all want to fit in, win and be thin, but at what cost, when we all are the same individuality gets lost, I like being different and unique, I'm 36 and I've yet to begin let alone piqued, my whole life is ahead, I'll quit when I'm dead, cuz it won't be a choice, it took me a long time to find my voice, first I discovered who I was, had to be brave dig deep testing my balls and guts, it isn't easy following ur own path, we've abandoned our moral compass and lack tact, gone are the days of chivalry and empathy, corporations aren't people they're an entity, we need to get money out of our elections, our government exists for protection, and is supposed to be a public service, nobody is worthless, our vote matters in democracy, I can't stand republican hypocrisy, liberals are far from prefect too, checks and balances are the proverbial glue, keeping ourselves in check, is this Congress' best, cuz it's rather quite pathetic, pay attention to ur rhetoric, yes words hurt, it's ok to curse, as long as it's not unnecessarily excessive, my lyrical content is pretty eclectic sometimes eccentric but always thought provokingly impressive, u just have to listen carefully, I write magically/miraculously, I simply do, unfiltered and uncensored too, let if flow stream of consciousness style, this crazy obnoxiousness is wild, where are the revolutionary artists, it's hardest selling urself when ur naturally genuine humble and modest, where's my Suge Tommy Puffy or Clive, how did the late bloomers like me manage to survive, all those years unnoticed, having to applaud mediocre or straight up atrocious, the spirit of Pac evokes us, cuz we're both Geminis, when did avid hip hop fans become desensitized, rappers were activists, Eminem is sick with his rhyme schemes and adjectives, I know I come of arrogant cocky pompous and pious, and obviously I'm biased, but I've got mad poetry and song writing talent and skills, even tho my performances videos and sales don't pay the bills, I know I still have purpose and value, I work a day job cuz I have to, I'm not rich nor famous, and I'm starting to get incredibly anxious, cuz I deserve a turn, I've fallen been beaten and burned, but every single time I got up healed tried again and learned!

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
8/10/18

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

A Rose That Chose To Grow From Snow

Lead by example not lecture, watch out cuz karma's gonna get ya, after all we get what we give, ur not God so don't judge the way I live, worry about urself, I'm here if I can help, but I'm learning, to focus more on working, even music and poetry is just a hobby, the womb is really hell's lobby, are we fallen angels, perception's different depending on the angles, what happens after death, will I remember regrets, for the next time, there may be reincarnation but no rewind, or is it simply black, for a male I have a decent rack, always getting complimented on my chest, I try to give my all and do my best, that's all anyone can ask, I refuse to wear all the different masks, I've got one face not two, tho that's what Geminis do, see both sides, they're insightful and wise, balancing the extremes, do u ever find urself wondering what it all means, what's life's purpose, why does the universe keep hurting us, or is it self inflicted, I don't like the way gays are depicted, so one dimensional, ur discrimination is intentional, we don't need more hate, the human race could be great, but we implode before we grow, global warming is not a hoax or a joke, we are the biggest contributors, I wanna be a marijuana distributor, or what's called a bud tender, when I think about the amount of money one must render, to just survive, I feel like I don't jive, perhaps I was born in the wrong era, have u ever written urself a letter, I find it helps during reflection, hindsight works for future protection, but there's no such thing as perfection, I wonder who'll be running in the next presidential election, still gotta get thru these midterms, maybe it's the kids turn, let them lead and take control, Bette sings "far beneath the bitter snow", "lies a seed that with the sun's love in the spring becomes a rose", funny to think our personalities are based on the birth month we chose, it's been said we pick our parents, I don't believe in jealousy nor arrogance, cuz I'm grateful appreciative and blessed, this journey is filled with trial and error and a lot of hypothesized guess, we're bound to fail and fall, scale those boundaries and walls, breakdown barriers and blocks, don't ever give up or stop, especially on ur dreams, who says u have to be part of a team, I don't need another man to complete me, wish evil would retreat please, they may have won the battle but never the war, someday I hope to take the next step and be an opening act for a major artist on tour!

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
8/7/18

Friday, July 20, 2018

Are Ya'll Prepared To Be Wowed Right Now

Not every day has to be about social justice, when it comes to life I feel the need to crush this, I put way too much pressure on myself, when we die we can't take our wealth, so why does how much we accumulate matter, if ur wallet's fatter does that make u happier, or simply less stressed, u don't have to be the best, especially at everything, I readily admit I rap better than I sing, and I'm totally ok with that, don't talk about it behind my back, say it to my face, u fucking waste of a disgrace, I hate flakes and fakes, be a genuine gentleman, I don't care if u did meth or heroine, shit congrats, I'm very mellow nonjudgmental chill and relaxed, look how far uve come instead, don't live as tho ur already dead, enjoy existence more, figure out what ur here for, or ur meaning and purpose, I find I learn more from the things that hurt us, I truly believe it all happens for a reason, people are like seasons, relationships change, best friends become estranged, time space and fate always seem to get in the way, I try not to play victim cuz I'm gay, another white boy appropriating rap, hip hop straight up dumb/whack, I ain't no ghetto gangsta black daddy mack, criticize my talent not who or what I do in the sack, this isn't an attack, I'm trying to fill in where ya'll lack, an original one of kind, a vocabularian mind that loves to rhyme, making u think and feel, u can connect and relate cuz what I'm saying is real, I'm baring both my heart and soul, winning a Grammy and selling out stadiums is my ultimate goal, and I know it's quite lofty, ya'll can snicker and scoff at me, all u want, but expect the middle finger boasting and watch me flaunt, an ear to ear smile, maturity and graceful tact just isn't my style, I'm a condescending sarcastic prick, and can be a big dick, when taken advantage of, u got pacific or atlantic love, I'm torn between the 2, still don't know what I'm gonna do, it depends of if this job becomes perm, waiting's making me squirm like a worm, some say Chicago or bust, moving and starting all over again take cajones strength and guts, but I gotta get out of this depressive rut, test my skills perseverance and luck, it's now or never baby, stop with the ifs ands buts or maybes, make a plan and follow thru, please don't look back with regret too, seize control of this moment right now, perhaps someday ya'll will read my poetry or hear my music in utter awe jaw dropped mind blown and incredibly wowed!

Peace and 1,
Joe Conscious
7/20/18